For Christmas this year, my lovely husband gifted me with one of those Apple Watches. It goes without saying that I am very lucky to receive such a generous present but, honestly, I have mixed feelings. I hate being “available” all the time and I am never going to use 99% of the crap on that thing. There is one new thing it does that sadly might come in handy. I call it the, “I’ve fallen and I can’t get up” feature. Apparently, if you have the Apple Watch 4 (and you’re wearing it at the time) if/when you face plant and don’t get up, it will call your local Emergency Services as well as a handful of numbers you’ve identified as your, “Emergency Contacts”. Now, just so we’re clear, it’s not that my general dancer-like dexterity has abandoned me or that I’ve taken to wandering into traffic after a morning of binge drinking.
It’s my dog. In the past six months or so, my 2 year old 120lb Rottweiler “puppy”, Ludo, has realized he is a lot stronger than I am. That fact, combined with the sad truth that my baby is slightly less than perfectly leash trained, has resulted in several less than smooth landings on my part. Now you understand why I have this thing strapped to my wrist.
What I didn’t realize about the Apple Watch initially, was all the fun outfits (bands) you could get for it! Ok, now this is starting to sound more like something I can get excited about. My husband, realizing he wanted me to wear this thing and that there was more than one way to skin a fashionable feline, encouraged me “find some fun bands”(outfits for my new little friend). Initially, of course, I got the obviously amazing orange Hermès Single Tour in 44mm and then I thought, “I need more of a neutral/everyday “workhorse” of a band…and I don’t want to see myself coming and going…” Yes, I have these thoughts. At this very same moment, my husband saw the bill for my first fore into my new watch’s wardrobe (from Hermès) and encouraged me to be mindful that we had children whom would most certainly want to attend College. Hmmm.
In that moment (and with the commensurate amount of force), the Louis Vuitton Monogram Print slapped me in the face – metaphorically speaking. Talk about a neutral “workhorse”!! The coated canvas used to make arguably the most recognizable bags in the world, is practically indestructible and could easily, in my opinion, be found one day in chic clumps alone with the cockroach when man is long gone.
A quick search on my lovely laptop revealed the exact band booty I was dreaming of and – hold the phone – it gets better! Right there on my screen appeared an altruistic artisan in Sugar Land, Texas selling handmade Apple Watch bands out of authentic “repurposed” luxury handbags!! Holy Shit!! I could even get them monogrammed!?!! My little watch could look amazing and I could help the world?? All for under $100.00?? I love you person in Sugar Land, Texas who loves the Earth!!!! Now, I have to get a brown bag to breath in.
So just like that – as quickly as my little fingers could peck in my credit card number and click the box for expedited shipping- my Apple Watch had a new (to me) luxury “everyday look” (yes, I’ll swap into my Hermès when the mood strikes) that makes my wrist and Mother Earth look beyond fab!! God, I’m good.
Watch out, dog:):)